YCAC Gents
On a cold and overcast autumn day out at Yamate the mighty Gents eased to victory over the Zenkai (“Last Time”) Beers to continue their unbeaten run this season.

With this match falling in the middle of a three day weekend there were a number of regular players missing and this resulted in 1st Team lock Aran “Big Dell” Delaney being “promoted” to loose head prop. Luckily for Aran the Beers tight head prop was only the largest opponent YCAC will play all season – he would definitely have been 150 kg plus. However, as it turned out the YCAC scrum completely dominated the Beers scrum, marching them backwards several meters on numerous occasions during the match. In fact, YCAC’s scrummaging was so strong that the introduction of powerhouse hooker Scott “Several Bellies” Sizemore in the second half changed the situation from “dominant” to “dangerous” and safety-conscious referee Steve “The Vicar” Lewis (resplendent with his new “Thunderball” whistle) felt obliged to instruct the YCAC pack to stop pushing. Sizemore was disgusted.

With the YCAC front row setting such a solid platform the rest of the team were able to enjoy the spoils. Livewire flanker Kenji “Red Gloves Watermelon” Yoshioka took full advantage of the gaps that were appearing by scoring a first half hat-trick. Kenji has been in fine form this season and bears all the marks of a YCAC top try-scorer – he has blinding speed, good evasive skills and he absolutely refuses to pass the ball!

But if Kenji was the star of the first half then the second half belonged to lock Brimman “Brutus” Frazer whose two tries were even more impressive when some background information is taken into account. You see, the place to be in Tokyo the night before the game was the Ebisu pad of the YCAC 1st Team Captains of Vice (Dean “Mama’s Boy” Stallard and Tristan “I Love Dean’s Mum” Fahy) where Stallard was celebrating 30 years of his existence. Young Frazer began his Saturday night by politely attending to wish Dean well and after drinking his fill at this soiree decided to sample the delights of Roppongi. One thing led to another and Frazer ended up only getting back to his Gaijin House (not alone, it should be added) at 7 am on the morning of the match. After this outstanding effort all agreed that he could almost be forgiven for losing his MVP sculling contest against his Beers opposite. Almost.

Joe

YCAC 2nd Team
In fading daylight and howling wind the mighty Gents maintained their unbeaten record this season with another come from behind victory.

The Donkeys played with the wind at their backs in the first half and took full advantage, scoring two tries to nil and heading into the break with a handy 12 point lead. However, the YCAC Gents are nothing if not experienced and there was no sense of panic during the half-time huddle.

When the second half kicked off it was the Gents who got on the board first with flyhalf Ben “Mellow Fox” Duncan touching down after weaving through several defenders. The Donkeys showed they were not going down without a fight by hitting back immediately with a try of their own. However, the Gents confidence was growing and they were soon back on the board after a nice linking move between No. 8 Kieran “Hisashiburi” Walsh and halfback King, Richard “The 3rd”.

With the Gents one try down with only a few minutes to go the match was heading into “cometh the hour, cometh the man” territory. So often for the Gents this man is the long-standing captain Steve “The Vicar” Lewis. The fact that he wears a different uniform to the rest of us and runs around the field with a whistle in his mouth matters not a jot in the record books. However, on this occasion the Vicar was in Sendai on judicial officer duties for the Japan v Canada match so the burden of manufacturing a victory fell into the players’ hands for once. How fitting it was then that it was on-field captain Jason “The Don” Dunn who scored the try to draw the game (outsprinting two Donkeys defenders to touch down in the corner) and YCAC veteran Mellow Fox Duncan who knocked the conversion over from the sidelines to secure the narrowest of victories.

Finally, a special mention should go to Steven “AFL” Rode and Alex “NFL” Benson who were outstanding yesterday in their first ever games of rugby. Rodey made several strong runs from the centers and Alex pulled off a try-saving tackle on the wing which later led to him being given the Man of the Match award. Captain JD predicted that they were both having such good days that they were bound to get lucky last night but no reports have come back on this matter yet.

Joe

YCAC 1st Team
On a sunny but windy day out in Yamate the YCAC 1st Team came up against their first serious opposition in the Kanagawa League 1st Division in the form of a committed and well-drilled Shonan Fuji side.

YCAC started the match fairly well with the forwards achieving their normal domination in the set piece and Steve “Big Cuzzy Bro” Gray outstanding in his first full match this season. This early pressure led to YCAC opening the scoring through a try to hooker Daisuke “Silent Assassin” Okada after some good mauling work from the rest of the forwards. Unfortunately, a knock-on from the kick-off and a couple of missed tackles immediately let Shonan Fuji back into the match with a score of their own. However, from this point onwards YCAC knuckled down and finished the first half the stronger of the two teams after a fantastic pass from flyhalf Rich “Fabio” Watkins put inside center Mike “Griffo” Griffin into some clear space.

With the wind at our backs in the second half it was a confident YCAC side who ran out onto the field after the half-time break. However, Shonan Fuji made some substitutions at half-time which strengthened their pack (particularly their scrum) and the YCAC forwards got sucked in to trying to do too much themselves. Shonan Fuji tied the game with a try in the corner early in the second half and that was the end of the scoring.

It is often said that a draw “is like kissing your sister”. Being an only child the writer has never quite understood the dynamics of this but if the feeling after the match yesterday is the same as the feeling after kissing your sister then kissing your sister must be bloody awful!

However, while this was ultimately a disappointing result, there were plenty of positives to come out of this match. The biggest one is that we now have a much better feel for the level at which the top teams in the Kanagawa League are playing at. To progress to the East Japan Club Championships we need to finish in the top two in the Kanagawa League 1st Division Spring Competition. It is likely that our main rivals are going to be Shonan Fuji and the two Kanagawa League teams currently up in the East Japan Club Championships (Taisei and Quill). What yesterday’s result shows is that we are definitely good enough to win promotion out of the Kanagawa League but we have now hit a level whereby we are not guaranteed to win every time just by showing up.

Joe

YCAC 2nd Team
Are First Team wingers getting braver? Or are they just getting more stupid? Either way, First Team winger Epps agreed to fill in at loose head prop for the Gents and was then confronted by the biggest Japanese prop ever to grace (or was it disgrace?) the fields of Yamate. This was no powder-puff lump of lard, but 6 foot 6 inches and 30 stone of wounded sumo wrestler for whom rugby is now his only lawful means of battering human flesh. From the get-go, he bulldozed the YCAC scrum and flattened any player who came within his massive clutches (with or without the ball). For the one and only time this season, the YCAC Gents found their scrum so utterly disrupted that no clean ball was received from that outlet. The result was that we were living off scraps from line-out, ruck and maul.

Fortunately, Ben “Mellow Fox” Duncan stayed on the field after the First Team’s rout of Kamariya Club and produced a masterful display of deft touches with hand and boot to create tries galore for YCAC Gents. Ben scored one try himself, created another for Kenji Watermelon and the final two tries of the first half were scored by the man with the plumiest English accent in the side: Taichi “I Didn’t Go To Oxford, But You Would Have Thought That I Did” Noda. The matches in England and Wales at the weekend may have been dull kicking-fests, but Yamate in November is guaranteed to bring an avalanche of free-flowing rugby. So whilst YCAC scored four tries in the first half, they were matched by Kawagoe Fighters’ three tries leading to a nail-biting half-time score of 24-17.

The second-half started brightly for YCAC as Mellow Fox carved open the opposition to put Bill “Fountain of Youth” Baker through for a score that resembled his match-winning performance in last year’s Over 35′s Tournament. Kawagoe Fighters fought back immediately with a try of their own as the excitement and physicality grew. As if to answer the question posed at the beginning of this Match Report, erstwhile First Team winger Kenji Watermelon sprinted down the right wing, crossed the try line and then jack-knifed with a view to running between the posts. But then he was flattened by a Kawagoe Fighter and stepped on the dead-ball line, thereby sacrificing a certain try. Fortunately, YCAC had MVP impact sub Scott “Five Bellies” Sizemore to unleash on the Kawagoe Fighters and Scott’s beefy presence in the front row restored scrummage ball for the Gents. With more ball in hand, YCAC’s three-quarters began to exert their influence and Kenji Watermelon redeemed himself with a try five minutes later. Captain Tony Baildon put the icing on the cake with a final try to see YCAC slightly flattered by the 43-24 final score.

Postscript: The 30 stone of wounded sumo wrestler is actually Kawagoe Fighters’ First Team Captain and Kawagoe’s First Team are not a bad side having beaten Tokyo Gaijin earlier this year. So what a compliment it is to the flowering loosehead career of Epps that this Man Mountain came to the referee mid-way through the second half with a plea to stop Epps charging in early to get the first-up hit! With Tony Woodcock cited for foul play in the Bledisloe, Epps is now awaiting the All Black call for their European Tour.

Vicar

YCAC 1st Team
On a perfect autumn day out at YCAC the home team overwhelmed Kamariya Club to maintain their perfect record in the Kanagawa League 1st Division.

Kamariya were actually our opponents in the Kanagawa League 2nd Division final this spring. We beat them 38-0 in that match but they won promotion to the 1st Division the following weekend by triumphing 15-8 over the Black Sea Gulls in a promotion / relegation match. However, they are clearly struggling with the step up with a for and against of 0-188 from their first three matches.

Sensing early on that this was going to be an easy match the YCAC team played a sluggish first half. However, it was discussed at half-time that the team we are playing next Sunday (Shonan Fuji) put 91 points on Kamariya and a collective decision was made to step up our efforts in the second half.

As always, there were several stories to come from the try scorers:
* Captain of Vice Tristan “Inside Center” Fahy crossed the line first for YCAC but then unfortunately had to leave the field shortly afterwards with a knee injury. Rumours that he deliberately injured himself after hearing from his fellow Captain of Vice (Dean “Fish” Stallard) how much more enjoyable Saturday nights are when you don’t have to play rugby Sunday are yet to be confirmed.
* Hardworking lock Aran “Big Dell” Delaney scored next for YCAC. This was Big Dell’s first try for the club and guarantees that he won’t be eating bagel after the 2010 Panty Shield – a guarantee that his fellow American Erich “Freezer” Friess would give his left testicle to secure.
* Inside center Mike “Griffo” Griffin overcame a niggling groin injury to score a hat-trick of tries – Kamariya must be hating the sight of Griffo as he scored a pair last time we played against them. After a couple of years playing for YCAC Griffo has now become completely acclimatized to the Japanese amateur rugby culture and, deciding to take a “When in Rome” attitude, has now incorporated cigarette breaks as key parts of his warm-up and warm-down routine.
* 19 year old fullback Noah “The New Crowbar” Pflaum continued his amazing scoring run by bagging another 24 points in this match, bringing his tally to 80 points in just five games (7 tries, 21 conversions, 1 penalty). The only thing looking like to stop Noah at present is a promise by Tristan Fahy to take the young fella under his wing and show him the delights of Roppongi.
* Finally, veteran back Ben “Angry Fox” Duncan did a day of self-imposed penance, trying to work off a massive hangover by playing most of the 1sts game and all of the Gents game. If that is what you play like hungover mate, you should start having a few on Saturday night more often!

YCAC 1st Team
It is said that a week is a long time in sport but maybe that is a conservative estimate because a mere three days after the YCAC 1st team experienced the jubilation of winning the GM Cup fixture against the Tokyo Crusaders they were brought back down to earth with a bang by an incredibly strong Keio University side.

Amazingly enough, given the scoreline, there were actually some positives to take out of this match. One was the performance of Noah “The New Crowbar” Pflaum who moved in from fullback to flyhalf for this match and had an exceptional game, seemingly playing the entire Keio team by himself at times. Another was the efforts of the YCAC forwards – we won all of our own lineouts and spent most of second half pushing the Keio pack off the ball in the scrums. Finally, the character showed by the whole team was heartening. Down 90 points with 20 minutes to play you would have been a brave man to bet against a century of points being scored but in fact YCAC spent most of that time camped on the Keio line and were unlucky not to manage a try themselves.

The YCAC v Keio University match is the oldest fixture involving a Japanese team, being first played in 1900, so it is a real shame that it is threatening to become permanently lopsided in favour of the students. Last season, even without a number of our regular 1st team backline, it was a fairly competitive match (the final score 45-14 in favour of Keio) but this year Keio were simply too good. It is clear that the midweek timing of this season’s match was not helpful, a mistake we won’t be repeating, with six of the seven backs who started against the Cru unavailable for this match. However, six of the eight forwards who started against the Cru were present so Keio do deserve a lot of credit for the way they played. In the writer’s opinion, this Keio side was better than the Keio All-Stars team we got stitched up to play against for the university’s 150th anniversary celebrations in March 2008. The speed with which the students played the game was truly impressive, as was their aggression when tackling and with ball in hand.

For this fixture to continue to be meaningful we either need to get a lot better or they need to get a lot worse. Of course, we all hope the former occurs. Still, it may pay to bring along some laxatives to slip into their water bottles before the next match – just in case!

YCAC 2nd Team
As a cow-pat attracts flies, so the Bledisloe Cup in Tokyo attracted the foul-smelling Wild Men of Tottori and a horde of overseas Kiwis/Aussies who were desperate to pollute the purity of the Yamate Field. Indeed, the evening before the game both Nick “If you Think Fraser Has Put on a Bit of Weight, Take a Look at me” Garling and Steve “I Was So Drunk All Weekend I Couldn’t Even Hit the Wall With My Pizza From 3 Paces” Smith made themselves available for selection. But, of course, none of the Aussies turned up (as usual!) so it was Kiwis who bolstered the ranks of the YCAC Gents.

Sadly, two of our number were playing their final games for YCAC before heading for life overseas. Fittingly, both Graeme Creighton (South Africa) and Sandy Rose (Spain) scored fine individual tries. Both have a liking for heights with Sandy being a world-renowned co-pilot and Graeme having recently married a pole vaulter.

As in our previous encounters, the Wildmen of Tottori have improved year after year under the expert coaching of Neil “Teflon” Smith. Fortunately for YCAC, scoring tries has never been Teflon’s strong point and so the Wildmen were unable to convert all their pressure into points. And so at half-time the scores were evenly balanced at 12-5 to YCAC.

In the second half, YCAC brought on its Big Gun in the shape of Scott “Four and a Half Bellies” Sizemore who had clearly been stung into a fitness regime by last week’s match report. The shedding of half a belly was not enough to save the Wildmen from the Scrummage Squeeze and Shove that Scott has perfected. Kenji Watermelon profited from the dominance of the front row by scoring two tries around the fringes.

To cap a wonderful afterrnoon, the Legend of Yamate himself (Simon “El Presidente” Ryan) trotted off the bench but sprinted through the opposition to score close to the posts. What a tactic : the opposition fall for it ever time. Bring on a guy who looks to be in his eighties and then see him sprint to the line. Maybe the Aussies should have tried that rather than relying on a bunch of school-kids in the Bledisloe.

On being asked to comment on the performances of Referee Vicar and Assistant Referee Partyman, the watching Paddy O’Brien guffawed in a manner which suggests that neither are likely to receive the international call-up they both think they deserve.

Vicar

YCAC 1st Team
On a sunny day in Yamate the YCAC 1sts triumphed over a competitive Tokyo Crusaders side to retain the GM Cup and extend their lead in the total tally to 6-4.

In the week leading up to the match there had been murmurs that the Cru would be making use of several “guest players” and these rumours proved to be accurate with a couple of our friends from the Nagoya Barbarians bolstering the Cru front row and some other players coming in from a little further abroad (including the eventual Man of the Match from the Cru, a current Hong Kong international).

The Cru were clearly very ‘up’ for this match and the writer was impressed to see them already stretching as a team when he arrived at YCAC at 10:30 am (an hour and a half before kick-off). However, once the match kicked off it was the home team who started stronger with the phenom, 19 year old fullback Noah “The New Crowbar” Pflaum, getting YCAC on the board with a penalty early on and then going on to score the first try of the match.

Down 10-0 after only a few minutes it would have been easy for Cru heads to drop but that didn’t happen and it was obvious that this encounter was going to be far more keenly contested than the blowout one year ago when the Cru hit back with a try to veteran halfback Tom Summersall.

It is sometimes difficult to pinpoint exactly when the turning point of a match is. Some would point to the series of 3 quick tries for YCAC midway through the second half but for the writer there were two incidents in the first half which were more telling – a YCAC push-over try and a miracle tackle by Noah Pflaum to deny the Cru what looked like a certain score. The combination of these events gave YCAC a feeling that they had the winning of the game as long as they stuck to their strategy.

The first half closed out with each team getting one more try, YCAC’s score coming after a good run from impressive openside flanker Brimman “Brutus” Frazer. The message at half-time was just to keep it up and the second half started well with lock Sias “Big Daddy Potheater” Potgieter scoring from a driving maul. At this point YCAC had the luxury of bolstering their forward pack by bringing on four players who had all represented their country at various levels – lock David “Dixie” Dix (Wallabies), lock Brendon “Cheese” Timmins (NZ Universities, Highlanders Super 12), flanker Tony “The Original Big Daddy” Baildon (Australian Schoolboys) and No. 8 Steve “Big Cuzzy Bro” Gray (NZ Schoolboys) – and the win was sealed with a couple of tries from the writer who exploited well the age-old technique of following more talented players around and waiting for passes from them when they get tackled just short of the line.

Within minutes of the final whistle the Cup was filled with beer and passed around for all to drink out of, including Rochelle MacFadyen (Gareth’s sister) and Paddy O’Brien (Head of the IRB Referee’s Board). Paddy says he was very impressed with the standard of the match and would like to come back next year to referee it. Here’s hoping – after 10 fixtures competing for the Cup it is clear that both clubs remain extremely passionate about this match so it would be great to have such a distinguished referee controlling the game next year.

YCAC 1st Team 29, Ajisai 7 (HT: 17-7)

YCAC 2nd Team
Epic. That is the only adequate word. Down 7-5 going into the last play of the game and scoring a try to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat – it just can’t get any better than that …

Fujisawa West are one of the stronger opponents on the Gents fixture list. They are always competitive and on their day they can be very good indeed. However, the Gents were also fielding a strong line-up for this match so all the ingredients for the great game it ended up being were there right from the beginning.

Nothing could separate the teams during the first half and the score was still nil-all at the break. The deadlock continued for the first part of the second half before Fujisawa scored (and then converted) a very good try on the wing with about 15 minutes remaining.

7-0 to Fujisawa.

After conceding a converted try at this stage of such a tight match it would have been easy for heads to drop, but veterans Fraser “Buffalo Butt” Jamieson and Jason “The Don” Dunn rallied the troops superbly and YCAC soon hit back with an excellent try of their own, finished off by the youngster Jack “I’m so flexible I can give myself a …” Hatch.

Buffalo Butt Jamieson stepped up to take the conversion and, following the strategy of the conquistador leaders who scuttled their own ships to make sure their troops gave no thought of retreat, deliberately missed it to give the YCAC players no option of trying to play out a draw.

7-5 to Fujisawa

After YCAC’s score Fujisawa came back strongly and YCAC were very lucky not to concede a try when a Fujisawa player was driven over the line following some strong mauling. If the referee was normal Gents ref, Steve “The Vicar” Lewis, then such a fortuitous decision would not have been entirely unexpected. However, Vicar was nowhere to be seen (he was over at the Brunei 7’s on Judicial Officer duties) and it was actually one of Nagai-san’s young charges from the Kanagawa League who made the crucial call that the ball had been held up.

Lifted by this decision YCAC soon went back onto the attack after a punt from BJ Hatch inside his own 22 finished a meter short of the Fujisawa line. A series of charges followed before the ball eventually made its way into the hands of the smallest man on the pitch, “Caviar” Ken Noguchi, who spotted a gap that only he could fit through and burrowed his way over for the match-winning try.

With victory assured Buffalo Butt Jamieson graciously decided there was no need to inflict any further hurt on the opposition and proceeded to deliberately miss the final conversion.

10-7 to YCAC

Joe

YCAC 1st Team
Ajisai are one of the stronger teams in the Kanagawa League 1st Division so the YCAC 1st team was really looking forward to this match. It was therefore very disappointing when Ajisai announced an hour before kick-off that they were short of numbers due to a number of their players coming down with influenza. This resulted in an automatic win to YCAC in terms of the Kanagawa League competition but with Ajisai borrowing some players from Fujisawa West and YCAC’s own Aminiasi “Mini” Momo agreeing to play for the opposition a match was still able to go ahead, which was a good thing because it ended up being a very hard-fought contest.

If it was the Australians who were the starring nation for YCAC last week then it was the Fijians who took the honours for this match: Mini played like a demon at flanker for Ajisai, making a real nuisance of himself and prompting a decision to never agree to lend him to the opposition again, “Judo” Joe Naulu played an excellent half on the wing and (Fijian-born) YCAC veteran Eps “Little Cuzzy Bro” Tuibenau was his normal dynamic self, playing the first half at wing and the second half at flanker and scoring a try from each position.

The rise of the youngsters was talked about last week and the trend continued for this match with nine of the starting line-up (and all of the points scorers) under thirty. However, once again, the veterans made sure they weren’t forgotten – Erich “Freezer” Friess (prop) held his own marking a former corporate player, Ben “Angry Fox” Duncan (flyhalf) used the wind beautifully with his tactical kicking in the second half and Grant “Mr. Normal” Thompson (inside center) was has usual effective self in the YCAC mid-field.